When a Reboot Isn’t Enough, You Might Need a Reset

If you read last week’s post on travel and my recent trip to Vietnam and Cambodia, you won’t be surprised to read that I’m fairly determined to find a way to reference that trip in upcoming posts for the foreseeable future. If you didn’t read last week’s post, please bear with and indulge me (or go read it for context). My trip brought to the surface so many thoughts. It was that special. It’s rare to engage in a single event or experience that checks all the boxes of wellness but this one did. It gave me a total reset and I’m forever grateful.

Not a Reboot or a Recharge

A reset is not to be confused with a reboot. When computers get wonky, the first line of defense is usually to unplug and replug, rebooting the system. Unplugging and replugging often works with tired humans as well. When we’re tired, recharging our batteries or unplugging and replugging is often just what we need. A reset is a little more complex. It requires taking a look under the hood of your life system and tweaking or overhauling it, depending on what you find.

If you find some of the following under the hood when you check, some level of reset may be just what you need:

• Lack of motivation
• Monotonous routine
• Lack of fulfillment
• Feeling overwhelmed
• Inability to relax
• Physical symptoms of stress
• Feeling lost
• Lack of clarity
• Lack of goals
• Unhealthy eating habits
• Compulsive behaviors
• Constant conflicts
• Feeling disconnected

I flew to Vietnam in early January thinking I needed a reboot or mild reset. My mood was a little low and I was feeling unmotivated and disconnected. To be fair, I had at least 9 of the symptoms enumerated in the list above but hadn’t focused or identified them as such at the time. I had high hopes that the change in physical environment would be the tweak I needed to lift myself up. Changing my physical environment has worked for me in the past. Knowing what’s worked for you in the past when you’re facing any sort of challenge can be extremely helpful. The change in physical environment might have actually been all I needed. We’ll never know. Two weeks later, I felt as though every component in my personal wheel of health was realigned and properly connected.

Every Component of Overall Health Counts

In an earlier post dedicated to optimizing health, I wrote that health and wellness is a holistic, whole-being concept. We are at our healthiest only when all the components that come together to make up our state of wellbeing are attended to and aligned. Any component out of alignment – the proverbial weakest link – throws our overall health and wellbeing off kilter. Health is more than physical health and the components go beyond diet and exercise. The components I have in mind are those that make up the Duke University Wheel of Health: Physical Environment, Nutrition and Lifestyle, Physical Activity and Fitness, Rest and Sleep, Mental and Emotional Wellbeing, and Fulfillment and Purpose.

A reset may involve a tweak or change to a component of health and wellbeing or resemble a serious overhaul of several. Either way, it’s an open invitation to start fresh and even redefine your life and goals. Starting fresh makes it easier to break old patterns and habits that don’t serve you. It’s an antidote to feeling stuck.

A Reset Makes it Possible to Break Old Patterns

In my case, I broke my habits of bingeing food and television because I was on the go, busy, and having fun. I broke my sugar habit because the food I ate interested and satisfied me and wasn’t heavily laden with sugar. Also, there were no snacks lying around. My scrolling habit was broken by focusing on what we were doing rather than the latest and greatest on Instagram (I’m planning to be gentle with myself when that habit resurfaces because,,, C’mon…). Newer, good habits had the chance they needed to get firmly implanted. I lead a pretty sedentary life at home but when I was away, I was always moving and it felt good. I road a bicycle for the first time in more than 40 years, climbed up and down ladders and steep stairs at ancient temples, ducked through caves, crossed the street in Hanoi and shopped in Hoi An. The last two were serious cardio; my heart was pounding. I’ve managed to minimize my time on the couch since returning home and I’m back into long walks and regular pilates classes.

The Other Components

My trip also provided the opportunity to reconnect with purpose. We visited countries that had been ravaged by war and circumstance and had the opportunity to learn stories directly from locals. We were able to witness the work of and support NGOs on the ground that are making a difference in the day to day of lives of people, a very fulfilling opportunity that speaks directly to my values and sense of purpose. I have the sense that many people minimize the importance of fulfillment and purpose when assessing their overall state of health and wellbeing. That’s a mistake. Research clearly connects having a purpose in life with better mental health.

My mental and emotional wellbeing soared because I found myself in a safe space with like-minded ladies who saw me, accepted me, and laughed with me. I gave myself permission to be me, the version that’s open to whatever comes my way (including eating insects). Curiously, I also felt well rested on this trip even though I know my sleep was less than ideal. I suppose it was just the final piece in a reset puzzle that came together beautifully. I came home after a magical 2 week trip feeling better, brighter and happier than I have in a long time. Recommitting to myself and the life I want to live is important to me and I’m confident that I can now move forward in a healthy, meaningful, intentional, and productive way.

Reset With The Sun

The sun sets at the end of every day. Each new morning is a reset, offering a fresh start to anyone who needs it and feels brave enough to run with it. Sometimes a reset can just happen spontaneously. More often, we have to be aware of what’s going on and make a conscious decision to change the trajectory. Mindful awareness enables us to do that. It’s worth remembering that we can seek support in this process whenever we need it. We don’t have to go it alone, not even for a personal reset. We all do better with a tribe, village, circle, or friend, not to mention a therapist or coach. The fact that resets are possible is one of the most hopeful things about being human.

Musical Playlist While You Ponder This Post

I Can See Clearly Now by Johnny Nash, New Day by Michael Buble, Starting Over by Chris Stapleton, Brand New by Ben Rector, Dance Again by Selena Gomez, Start Over by Beyonce, Press Restart by Walk The Moon, Brighter Day, by Michael Franti & Spearhead

Thinking and Trying

Something to think about: “No matter how hard the past, you can always begin again.” —Buddha

Something to try: When you feel you need a reset, try any of the following (as many as possible) that work for you:

• Take a break from social media and your phone
• Walk outside at least 10 minutes each day
• Learn something new
• Declutter or change your space
• Do a guided meditation or a deep breathing meditation every day
• Journal
• Volunteer
• Dance
• Do something nice for someone else
• Work with a coach

And if you’re feeling bold and in need of an extreme makeover, consider changing your job, traveling, or moving.

Coaching Can Help

If you’ve looked under the hood, recognize you’d benefit from a reset but that feels overwhelming, consider working with a coach and optimizing your health. Let’s talk about it! You can schedule a 15 minute discovery call here. We’ll meet over Zoom and it’s free of charge.