Wishing You a Balanced New Year Without Wellness Obsession

Nutrition and wellness media send a lot of mixed signals and conflicting recommendations that frequently over-complicate the desire many of us share to get, be, or stay healthy. Information comes at us fast and furious and it’s frequently contradictory. It can be exhausting to weed through the myriad opinions that are always presented as though they’re scientific fact. The thing is much of it is not backed by real evidence. What’s more is that wellness is only attainable when it’s simplified. A sustainable plan must be simple to understand and easy to execute. Nothing about health is simple once a wellness obsession or overload takes hold. 

Drowning in a Sea of Wellness

If you’re deep in the weeds of wellness, you’ve probably heard go low-fat, stay away from carbs, sugar and seed oils, and eat a lot of fiber, protein, and plants. But if you’re trying to lose weight, stay in a calorie deficit, which is hard if you have to maximize protein, and whether or not you’re trying to lose weight, make sure your diet includes a sufficient amount of macros and micros to protect your bones, your immune system, your heart, your brain, your gut. But not too much! Stay away from processed foods and take supplements but be careful with supplements because they aren’t regulated. And get regular exercise but don’t focus on cardio. You should lift weights, do squats, drink bone broth, and get strong. But you should also do a lot of cardio. Get your steps in. And you should reduce stress. Ha! Meditate and focus on the present and get a lot of sleep and sunshine. It’s a full time job to take it all in, weed out hacks, quacks, and fear-mongers, and follow the rules you think might be right. 

Illness anxiety disorder is a real thing. As the name suggests, it affects people who obsess over sickness. Like any form of anxiety, it can be debilitating. The feverish pursuit of health can be just as detrimental. When a wellness obsession takes up too much time and energy, it misses the objective of optimizing your health and life. Orthorexia, disordered eating fixating obsessively on healthy or clean eating, is also a real thing and it can lead to severe anxiety and malnutrition. As a general rule, obsession is unhealthy.

Don’t, Shoulds, and Should Nots

A state of overall good health requires balance. I’m not a big fan of “don’ts,” “shoulds,” and “should nots.” There is no one size fits all when it comes to people and health. There are a few key components like eating enough but not too much, exercising regularly but not excessively, sleeping, connecting with others, having purpose or meaning and minimizing stress that we know are good for all of us in a general way. But the details differ. When we give ourselves the grace and opportunity, we tend to know what’s best for us and what we really need. Some days that looks like rest or a walk or time with a friend or an apple and some days, it’s cookies. Hard no’s and strict restrictions do not work well for most of us. Those of us who are really stuck when trying to figure out what to do are often best served by seeking support from a nutritionist, trainer, therapist or coach we like and trust. When navigating on your own, though, it might be helpful to:

1. Try a periodic digital detox. I was recently accused of looking at my phone too frequently and as I quickly felt myself getting defensive (my gut reaction was “But I know so many people who look at their phones more often than I do!”), I just as quickly realized my reaction was in itself a sign that I’ve become too attached to my phone. A digital detox gives us the space we need to wean ourselves from the constant noise of unhealthy wellness. It’s a chance to live the lives we’ve been cultivating. A break from wellness noise is a good way to live and feel well.
2. When your detox is over, identify the influencers you consider to be fear-mongers and just ignore them. Your list might differ from a friend’s list and that’s okay.
3. Disregard wellness rules that seem complicated. They might be sound but if they’re complicated, you’re not likely to keep following them. And the more complicated they are, the more likely there’s a pay to play aspect.
4. Stop comparing yourself to others.
5. Forget all or nothing thinking. This applies both to the way we see ourselves and the behaviors we adopt.
6. Remember that getting and staying healthy is meant to enhance your life and healthspan, not become your life because that would detract from your healthspan.

A Happy and Healthy Balanced New Year

Navigating wellness posts and reels can be a full time job. But it doesn’t pay very well and can cost you a lot. Conflicting opinions and a barrage of information make us feel unwell. That’s the wellness paradox, isn’t it? The quest to be well can make you so unwell. As we begin a new year, a time when people extend each other best wishes and many undertake resolutions, my wish for you is balance. Eat reasonably healthy, move your body, get some sleep, spend some time with friends and, most of all, be kind to yourself. Happy New Year!

Musical Playlist While You Ponder This Post

Fever by Peggy Lee, Doctor, Doctor by The Who, Doctor My Eyes by Jackson Browne, Feeling Stronger Everyday by Chicago, Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You) by Kelly Clarkson, In Repair by John Mayer, Be OK by Ingrid Michaelson, Save Myself by Ed Sheeran, It’s OK Not To Be OK by Marshmello and Demi Lovato, Breathe In, Breathe Out, Move On by Jimmy Buffet, Healing by Fletcher, 

Thinking and Trying

Something to think about: “Be careful about reading health books. You may die of a misprint.” —Mark Twain

Something to try: Check in with yourself. The start of a new year is a great opportunity to check in and assess how you’re doing. If you believe you could be doing better in any aspect of your life, think of one small thing you can change that would make even a small difference. Then do it. And keep doing it.

Join Our Tribe

I always feel smarter and stronger when I listen to and connect with wise people. My friends and fellow coaches Maria and Lorin are among the wisest people I know. The three of us joined together to bring you the Unpacking Midlife With The Wise Women podcast. You can listen on Spotify or Apple podcasts. We share our thoughts, concerns, and joys relating to our journeys through midlife. Whether you’re seeking guidance, validation, or the comfort of knowing you’re not alone, this community welcomes you.

Coaching Can Help

If you’re in the habit of setting yourself up for disappointment by committing to new year’s resolutions you can’t sustain but you want to make changes in your life, consider working with a coach. Together, we can help develop new rituals so you can feel more confident and move closer to the vision of you that aligns with the values you hold and the you that you want to be. Contact me here to talk about how coaching can help. The first session is 15 minutes over Zoom and it’s free.